Relying on order
As I mentioned on Monday, I hosted a bridal shower for The Bride this past weekend. It was a very successful affair and everyone had a great time. It wasn’t until I had been home for a few hours and was preparing for the week, however, that I realized something terrible:
I had left my notebook behind at the shower hall.
Now, something as simple as misplacing a single notebook isn’t really that big of a deal, especially because it turned out (a couple frantic text messages later) that the mother of The Bride had it safe and sound at her house. It’s just a notebook, right? It’s not even the notebook that I use for my job as a communications specialist, so I didn’t have to worry about going to work without that precious item.
It turns out that it’s not “just a notebook”. Not to me, anyways. All that the notebook really contained was plans for the bridal shower itself, a few blog posts that I’d written down and had already published on this blog and my rhetoric blog, and several to-do lists. Nothing particularly incriminating. Nothing that I couldn’t live without for a day or two.
I felt very anxious when I realized I didn’t have the notebook. I had to actually calm myself by engaging in deep breathing. Yes, I was without my to-do list, but there was nothing super urgent in there that I didn’t already have written down on my massive desktop calendar at home or in my phone. And the pages of blog posts and such were all public anyway – there was nothing really personal written in the notebook, were anyone to happen to read it.
I don’t know if any of you can quite relate to the feeling of your lists and articles being in someone else’s hands, but it made me surprisingly uncomfortable. I really, really dislike the notion of my daily notebook not being at my side. And I felt completely lost without my to-do lists.
What I’m really getting at here is that we often discover things about ourselves when the unexpected happens. For me, it was misplacing my notebook. I’ve always known that I’m someone who likes order and is fairly private, but I hadn’t quite realized just how much I rely on careful planning and how important it is to me to write things down in order to de-stress. I lead a very ordered life. And I like that. And my writing, when it’s handwritten or kept in my own personal notebook, is something very private to me… even when it’s just a to-do list with things like “go grocery shopping” and “write notes for conference speech”.
Have you recently been in a situation where you were unexpectedly confronted with a part of yourself? Are you a fan of to-do lists? How do you feel when someone else is holding onto a notebook for you – no matter how much you trust them?
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I have come to discover that I am supremely private when it comes to my writing — when I’m in the process of writing it. I don’t really know why that is; once it’s done, I put on-line for anyone to see, but if someone is looking over my shoulder while I’m carving out my paragraph, or even walks into the room, I am very quick to minimize my window and play Free-cell.
RE to-do lists: I am toast without them. They are the midwife to any successful day I am to have.
It’s strange, isn’t it? I’m much the same way – until it’s published, I’d rather not have people peeking at it.
Situations do not make the person, they reveal the person to themselves.
I’ve had situations reveal parts of my self that were quite painful to see, but also parts that made me quite proud. That’s the way the world goes round.
Indeed! It’s great to learn more about ourselves from the situations we find ourselves in.
What an interesting question! Nothing comes immediately to mind but I’m sure that I’ve been in a situation similar that’s taught me a lot about myself from the way I reacted. Glad you got your notebook back! I’ll be thinking on this one…
What an interesting post!!!! Really made me think! I don’t have a notebook like that but I do have private cards at home & other things & often I have thought that I really don’t want people to read them if, god forbid, I die suddenly & there they are – left behind…. not sure why it sure matter if I am gone (unless I said something bad, OH NO) but it does, like you said, tell me something about me now….
Always learning! 🙂
I have a folder/binder that has my calendar, address book, lists and notes, any papers I need or am working on for work, etc. I call it “my brain” and I definitely panic when I can’t find it. When my kids were smaller and I misplaced it, they would all have to look for “mommy’s brain”, and if I accidentally left it at work I never felt right until I had it back. I haven’t left it for several years, so I’m on a roll…… but you never know.
Several years ago, the zipper was broken, and I went on a massive search to find a suitable replacement. Sad, I know, but as you said, it’s not that its personal, just kind of a part of you as it contains your thoughts and plans.
I would have gone on a search for a replacement, too 🙂
“Mommy’s brain”… that is too cute.